About me? You want to know more about me really? Well buckle up, its boring and uninteresting. LOL
Gosh where do I start? I was born in March. I live in Texas. Great city of Austin. I’m the oldest of 3 kids. I have a little brother and a little sister. Although they aren’t so little anymore. They both have kids and their own families. Our parents are still married. In fact they just celebrated 36 years of marriage. We had a good childhood. I can’t really complain. We were poor. But mom and dad always seemed to figure it out.
I was a good kid. I didn’t get into a lot of trouble. Course there was plenty I did that mom and dad didn’t catch. I wish I had done more and got in more trouble. I consider myself a pretty sheltered kid. I did my fair share of under age drinking but I didn’t even try marijuana until I was 18. And I only did it because the guy I liked did it. Man that was a mistake. That guy ended up being my first husband and Marijuana was the source of a lot of arguments. And if anyone tells you that Marijuana doesn’t change people, they don’t know. They didn’t witness it like I did. I saw a person turn a complete 180 degrees from age 19 to age 26 and go from someone who was married with a family to someone who didn’t want anything to do with marriage and kids.
My childhood was good, My adult life, not so much. I’ve struggled with abandonment, self loathing, pure unadulterated anger, betrayal, and plain nastiness from people who said they were my friends. I’ve worked through some of that and I am still working on a lot of it.
I met the (what I thought was) love of my life at age 17. Weeks before my 18th birthday. My best friend at the time was in town visiting her dad. It happened to be her birthday. She called me up and said her boyfriend and his cousin were over. His cousin had just moved down to Texas from Virginia to learn the trade of Locksmiths to build his own business. So I went over. The first time I saw him he was slouched over in a dinning room chair, a crooked hat, a big baggy shirt, and when he stood up his pants were so baggy it looked like he had a load of shit in his pants. He is a white guy too. I instantly thought of the rapper Eminem. Because that’s what he looked like. We coined a description of him but its not very nice. Maybe I’ll share later. This should have been my first flag. He was 19 and had his own car. What did I know? I can’t remember what we did that day, I just remember we ended the night back at my friend’s house watching Erin Brockovich. He kissed me at that was it. By the time I headed home I was convinced he was the one. We dated for 3 years, bought a house, he proposed at the top of the Eiffel Tower in Las Vegas, we were engaged for 2 years and got Married February 26th 2006. We had a son the Following year. A year after that we opened a restaurant and 4 months into it my husband of barely 2 years decided he didn’t want anything to do with me and our son and he ran off with a 17 year old girl he employed at the Subway he managed. That was like getting hit by a mac truck. I had been self employed doing an at home daycare that he had asked me a month prior to close so that I could help him at the restaurant. So when he left I virtually had no income because at that point we had to shut the restaurant down. I failed. I failed at a business, I failed at being a wife, and I felt like I was failing as a mom.
I remember trying to go through my normal routine as if things weren’t changing. Trying to be positive for my kiddo. Who was only 18 months old. I remember being in the kitchen doing dishes and feeling like all of a sudden an elephant is standing on my chest and I can’t breath and feeling like everything around me was imploding and I couldn’t escape. I lost it and fell down on the kitchen floor with soapy hands and tears flooding my face unable to control it anymore. This happened a few times. i really did try to hold it together though. Luckily I had some good friends at the time who kept me busy and picked me up when I was down. Still there were times that I just couldn’t adult. I vented and bitched and complained. I said some really awful things about my cheating husband. I tried to be mindful of the kiddo when doing so, but most of what I said was over emails to a friend of mine. That friend, who will remain nameless (But she does tarot readings and crochets a lot) ended up sending our emails to my husband. Why, I don’t know. Was she trying to get my kid taken away from me? Was she trying to impress him and get in his pants? I don’t know. All I do know is that one Easter morning I woke up to a particularly heinous email from her and I unfriended, blocked, and never spoke to her again. I did this before I knew what she did with the emails. And this was someone I had known for 20 years. We had known each other since Kindergarten. So my mind is just as blown away as yours, at how someone who claimed to be my friend would betray me like that.
What I didn’t realize during the course of my relationship with either of these 2 people was that I had completely lost myself. I was Young when I “fell in love”. I was following society and what they said a young woman should do. But I had no idea who I was. I didn’t know what I liked, I didn’t know what I didn’t like. I didn’t know how to enjoy life. I stayed single for 4 years after my divorce. I learned to love myself and to get to know me. I found out who I was. And I found a lot of other things too. And it was the best 4 years of my life.
Now my life is better! I’m in another relationship. Have been for 5 years. We have 3 kids. 2 from previous relationships and one of our own. We both work damn hard for what we have and I think the thing that keeps us together and going is all the hardships we’ve both endured. We want better for ourselves and our kids. So we are working towards that. During my “find myself” time I started learning about this cool voodoo witch doctor plant juice called Essential Oils. I thought it was pretty cool but I didn’t really know much about it. Then a few years ago a friend of mine introduced me to Young Living Essential oils. And man are they amazing! So amazing in fact I have decided to make a business out of it. So here I am! The Leaky Bottle essential Oil mama!